Here I sit

I am finally sitting in the garden this morning. A space planned and built by me. To honor my son, Jason. This project has been healing for me. A place to put my creative energy. A place he would be proud of. Built with reflection and lots of love.

As I was putting this together, I had plenty of time to reflect and remember. I remember my dad watching me build some shelving, years ago.He told me I built just like his mom. Never really measuring anything, but seeing what I wanted to do and then just building it. My grandmother on my dad’s side died when I was young. But I have snippets of memories. When I look at pictures of her I can see myself in her style. Without really knowing her, I carry part of her in me. I would have liked to know her.

I got to thinking about how we all carry parts of others in us. These people make us who we are. I watch my now adult daughter and see so much of me in her, I pray it is only the good parts.

This morning I sit here in the garden, at peace, listening to the birds lift their voices in praise, to the one who formed me, and gives me the peace that passes all understanding. I think of those who have gone on before me and am forever grateful they are part of who I am. I will carry them with me, and pass them on to the next generation, with just a little of me mixed in.