to cast and stand

spring

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. – 1 Peter 5:7

We often hear the phrase – God never gives us more than we can handle – but I think he does. I think he gives us too much so we will learn to lean on him – so we will run straight into his arms. He wants us to depend on him, he wants to be our strength.

How many times do I struggle with a problem, or an issue for days, before I finally give up and hand it over to God? Too many. By the time I do hand it over, I am beaten down, exhausted.

I dislike that feeling, I dislike feeling beat up, and tired. If only I would let go sooner, if only that were my first thought instead of my last.

I have been having bad dreams lately, about bad things happening to people I love. It shakes me up. I begin to let my mind wander to places it should not go. I let fear and anxiety creep in. This is not new to me, but since Jason passed it is scarier and more real. Thoughts of what would I do if? How could I possibly remain sane if?

I am trying to not just push these thoughts aside, but cast them. Cast them on my God who is ready to take my anxiety.

Somehow I get it in my head that I must be stronger, I must push forward, I must …. whatever.

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. – Ephesians 6:13

To stand – that is it. I am not required to run a race, or dance with joy, or do anything but stand. Sometimes that is all I can do, all the energy that I have. All I can do is stand, and that is okay.

So the challenge I put to myself today, for this week, is to cast, and stand.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s